BTS of Online Business without the BS

Finding Success in Embracing Your Authentic Self with Jen Boyle

Tara Leson Episode 22

If you relate to getting caught up in comparing yourself online (who doesn't...), feeling the pressures around 'showing up' a certain way on social media, and building your business one way only to find out it's not at all what you want - you'll love this real, honest episode. 

Today on the podcast, Jen Boyle and I are chatting about her experience coming into a leadership role, initially thinking it meant she had to do it one way, be the authoritative leader, which she isn't. This shaped her journey to where she is now and how she empowers quiet and introverted women to find their own authentic way to lead and show up online and in their careers. 

We also dive into a lot around showing up authentically online, especially for someone who is quieter, and how Jen's business has evolved over the last couple years. 

We'd love to hear your takeaways from this episode! Connect with either me or Jen (or both of us!) below!

About Jen:

Jen Boyle is a Leadership and Communications Expert and the host of The Lead Quietly Podcast. She leads a welcoming community for quiet and introverted women, and her mission is to show quiet women that they can be great leaders, in business and career (and life) without being loud. She teaches women how to be stronger leaders, more effective communicators, and how to build credibility and online presence without having to be on social media 24/7. She is a Master’s educated communications professional with 20+ years of experience in the communications industry and more than 15 years building and leading high-performing teams.

Connect with Jen here:
IG: @leadquietly
The Quiet Leader Community (private Facebook Group):
https://www.facebook.com/groups/thequietleadercommunity
The Lead Quietly Podcast:
https://podcasts.apple.com/ca/podcast/the-lead-quietly-podcast/id1690023963 Free Guide - Introvert’s Guide to Building Online Presence for Business: https://lead-quietly.ck.page/58164316b4?fbclid=IwAR22bpYuLWtc5vKVqNk72oi1GJtEF4OGziZwMGPiEKJRHDA9YbYuBI3ZsiM

Connect with me here:
IG: https://www.instagram.com/iamtaraleson/
Website: https://www.taraleson.com

Send us a text

Speaker 1:

Welcome to the Behind the Scenes of Online Business Without the BS podcast. If you're a motivated entrepreneur with a dream of building your own sustainable online business, you are in the right place in the right place. I'm Tara the systems expert, and I help online business owners put systems into your business so you can live in your life, not in your business, and still make daily sales. I also love to keep it real with what it takes to build an online business. Get ready as we go behind the scenes on this wild ride of entrepreneurship and building successful, real businesses. Welcome back to the podcast. I have with me today Jen Boyle. She is a leadership and communications expert and also the host of the Lead Quietly podcast, and I'm so excited for this conversation. We are going to talk about a few things today, because Jen not only works full-time, but she also has her business, which has changed a little bit over the past couple of years, and so we are going to get into that and all of those things. Introduce yourself, let's hear all about you.

Speaker 2:

Awesome. Thank you, tara, so much for having me on your show. I am Jen Boyle and leadership and communications is really my area, and I specialize for introverted women and quieter women. And I like to use both of those terms introvert and quiet because I do think they mean different things that the introvert is more about your energy and how you recharge, and quiet speaks to those women who maybe feel hesitant and who feel a bit more shy or they hold themselves back from speaking up or maybe they don't like to be the center of attention. So that's why you'll hear me always use those two words.

Speaker 2:

So that is the the kind of woman who I want to attract in everything that I do in my podcast and that, if you're listening, and that's you, you're, you're my kind of person and that's who I want to help.

Speaker 2:

And my whole mission is to help you see that you can be a leader, whether that's in your career, in your home life or in business, without being loud. That is the real core of my whole message, because I think we assume leadership has to look one way, that it has to be very masculine and that you need to know everything. You have to be direct, you have to be the most outgoing and yet if that's not who you are, your natural personality, you will feel that leadership is not for you, whether that means running your own business, showing up on a networking call or getting a promotion or even just talking in a meeting at work. And I want to help quiet women and introvert women kind of step into that leadership so they actually do the things they want to do and they don't let that be a block for them.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, I love that. So how did you get into doing this? Because when you talk about that, I mean when we're thinking about those kinds of things it would have been hard, I guess, to think about you even like transitioning into doing something like that and like stepping into being the person that does this.

Speaker 2:

So how did?

Speaker 1:

that kind of evolve.

Speaker 2:

Oh, I love this question. So there's two things. How I even sort of discovered this topic of quiet leadership, like why is how is that? Even? A thing came from my own experience of being promoted at a young age into a leadership position at work overnight, without any warning, without any training, and one day my coworkers were now my staff and I was the quiet one and I thought honestly they made a mistake. Why on earth would they put me in this role?

Speaker 2:

And for months I tried to model masculine leadership. I tried to model what the aggressive women in the office did and I felt like such a phony and it felt awful and I and it wasn't effective because I I mean I, you can tell when someone is phony and I had this aha moment a few months into this job, you know, after hiding in my office and not wanting to think that I could do this. And it was like I had this aha moment one day and I said, wait a second, I don't have to do what I've seen around me. I don't have to run my team like they're running their team. I don't have to give my team like they're running their team. I don't have to give a presentation like that guy, I don't have to talk to my staff just because that's how she talks to her staff and it was very empowering to realize I could give myself permission to lead a different way. Over the years I really leaned into my natural abilities of listening and perceiving and being emotional and caring and thoughtful and building multiple teams. So I've been in leadership roles for over 15 years now and have come a long way. So I'm more confident, obviously, as a leader now than we back then. So that's how I even discovered this sort of like quiet leadership as a thing, and then getting over my own self to get out there and just turn it into a business and put myself in line to actually start a podcast and and all of that I think a lot of women will relate to this.

Speaker 2:

It has come from a deep sort of inner desire to to not waste my life and to do what I want to do, to follow that dream, to listen to that voice that says you can do more, you have more potential than you're using right now. And as I get older and I'm in my forties now, I feel that so strongly. Time is passing. When are you going to do it, career? I don't know what, you know, the next 20 years, say, of career, is what I have in front of me, and do I want to just go to work every day, or what do I want to make of it?

Speaker 2:

So the desire for that, or, alternatively, the feeling of regret if I don't, is what has pushed me, through my own hesitation, through my own blocks, to get out there, to like, be brave enough to start something. It helps to have friends, it helps to have, you know, peers in the industry and fellow entrepreneurs. Support is so necessary, and the one thing that has helped a lot, and that I love talking about as well, is, if you're quiet, if you're introverted or whatever, it helps to figure out how you communicate best, what channels work for you and what doesn't, so that you just don't fall into the trap of copying what everyone else is doing and it not feeling right. So that's why I fell in love with podcasting, that's why I love writing, that's why I prefer to do some of those things over video sometimes.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, yes, all of that is so good. There's so many things that I want to go back to in that. So first off, I just want to say I cannot imagine you being like the masculine, like get after everyone, like hard ass leader. First off, I can't imagine you doing that. I just have to say that like can't even picture that in my head. That's just funny. But that I love how you say like you just decided to do this because just all of that thinking about you know you didn't want to waste your life, and I think that that's so important for people to think about. Like when else are you going to do this? Yeah, and it's so true. Like what, when are you going to do it? If you don't do it now, when is it going to happen?

Speaker 1:

You know and if it's something that you truly want to do, no matter what it is it like it really doesn't matter. You don't do it now. When's going to be the time?

Speaker 2:

Yep, yep.

Speaker 2:

And the older you get, the more time is passing and it's different, maybe when you're 20 and you feel like you like so many years left and you you feel kind of you know young and confused and you don't know what to do with your life, and it feels it hits different after 40, when you you're sort of looking at the backend of your working life and you think what's the, what's the impact I want to make, what's the legacy I want to leave and how do I actually want to spend my time? And I don actually want to spend my time and I don't want to spend it unhappy.

Speaker 2:

I don't want to spend it grinding away for the paycheck yeah, exactly, exactly.

Speaker 1:

I know I think about that a lot and it's just really what? Yeah, what do I want to do with my life? Like, what do I want to do, not what I think everyone else thinks that I should do. What do I I want to do with my life? Like, what do I want to do, not what I think everyone else thinks that I should do. What do I really want to do and how do I want to?

Speaker 2:

live and it can be hard, like so many of us feel that and desire it. And then comes the hard part of how do you live it. And I'm still on the journey of trying to figure that out while paying the bills, you know. Trying to figure out while still living in reality and knowing you can't burn the boats and quit and like it's just not that easy.

Speaker 1:

So it is a journey, it's definitely a journey yeah, it definitely, definitely is, because there is the whole reality piece that it's not just this. You can just live the dream because you decide to. So, yeah, yeah, it's looking at all of it how you talk about you know you do get to choose the way that this looks and you chose the things that you really resonated with doing. So, like your podcast, like writing more. So talk a bit about more about that.

Speaker 2:

Well, I can say so. I've been in business for two and a half years and for the first two, shall we say I I was like everyone else who just gets started. You just don't know really, until you get in there, until you kind of get out there and you get brave enough to make a page or start posting content or start talking to people and assuming that identity, like I'm an entrepreneur, I have a business.

Speaker 2:

like there's those early fumbly days and I definitely experienced all of those things posting my very first Instagram story you know, sitting in the parking lot recording it 17 times, posting it and then immediately wanted to take it down because I look terrible and you know all those things. And I really found it was a lot of experimenting. It was a lot of trying things and, honestly, a ton of failures it was. It was like this didn't work, that didn't work, or I'm bored, I don't want to do this anymore, or I'll try this because I see someone else trying this and then I realized this doesn't feel like me or I don't like this, and it can be very challenging in in that time If any of your listeners are in that place too, it can be hard to sort of figure out.

Speaker 2:

Am I just not sticking with it and like getting over my own fears, or am I really misaligned and this is just like a bad fit for me? And oh, I was in confusion and I still get confused over that. But I kind of got caught up, honestly, in the pressure of the online world and I invested a lot of money in coaching and money well spent in that.

Speaker 2:

It taught me things and not all of it good, right, I like I learned some lessons about overnight success. I learned about what works for one person might not be the strategy for you and all of that.

Speaker 2:

So when I would strip away all of the like what you should do or sort of the gold standard for online business, if I just tried to get quiet and I would say, okay, what, what do I actually feel like doing? How do I, what do I want to say to the people in my community? And I would either hit record and just start talking or I would want to write. I didn't want to hold up my phone and document what I was having for lunch. It's like I just didn't want to do it and I felt like I had to and that was the only way. And it's like, no, it was so empowering to realize I don't have to do that.

Speaker 1:

And I love that so much, because that's the way that I look at this too is that you get to do it the way that you want. It literally does not matter what anybody else is doing. It doesn't not, it does not matter. And I actually just posted a video about this and I said like and I actually just posted a video about this and I said like ask yourself today, are you doing things in your business because it feels good to you, or are you doing things in your business because you feel pressured to, or like you should?

Speaker 1:

which is it and, like, really think about that. Give yourself like five minutes at least to really give some thought to that. Oh yes, it's so important, because there is so much that we're inundated with that it has to look a certain way and you should be doing this or you should be doing that, or there's only this one way, or whatever. There's so many ways that you can do things and the only way that's going to work is the one that feels good for you and the one that works for you.

Speaker 2:

That's it Exactly, and you have to be able to keep up whatever it is you're doing over time, right, exactly. People can say, like consistency is key. Yeah, that's, that's not wrong. Consistency definitely is necessary. Like, yeah, any successful brand out in the world keeps their doors open. So, yes, you know, like, the basic business principle is there. But what does consistency mean for you exactly? Does it mean making tiktoks and instagram and having a Facebook group and having a podcast and writing emails and, and, and, and, and, burning yourself out and realizing I don't like half of what I'm doing all day? That doesn't have to be your definition of consistency. So I think that's a great post and, I would think, reality check for some of us. Why did you start a business in the first place? Did you start it so you plan a whole bunch of stuff you don't like doing? Right?

Speaker 1:

Exactly, and I asked that to all the time like why did you start this? Like what was your reason for starting? It wasn't so that you could live your life online and ignore your family and just be like posting shit to Instagram all the time. That's what this was for and what like? Think about what you want to do with this. What's the impact you want to make, what do you want to say to who you want to work with? That's what matters. That's what matters.

Speaker 2:

Yep, yep, and there is a little bit of yes. There are parts of business or having a business that maybe aren't sexy or ain't aren't fun, and that we all have to do things that we don't love. I mean that happens in nine to five jobs too. There's parts of your job you don't like. I think we can all accept that.

Speaker 2:

It's like it's 75% of what you're doing stuff you don't like then, it's time to have another look at it and examine it because and it's like it's sort of the same as when I decided to lead my team in a different way Really you can give yourself permission to stop what you're doing right now and reevaluate and see if there's something that can change. And I feel like so often we get caught up in the power of what we see online that, oh no, come back to this way. Come back to this way because that's what's in our face most often yeah, yeah and it's no.

Speaker 1:

Don't change, because you know what will people think if you pivot, what are people gonna think if you do something different? What is gonna? Who the fuck cares?

Speaker 2:

or, oh no, your followers might go down, okay, right.

Speaker 1:

Like the thing that I always say about that. It's just like when you post something that's very opinionated, if you are going to divide people, you're either going to get people who absolutely love it and who are going to come closer to you. You're going to get people who absolutely don't agree and who are going to leave. Either way, you're going to divide people and it it doesn't matter, but you're going to be, you know, defining the people that you actually want there. You're seeing who you actually like, who is actually there, and it doesn't like. It doesn't matter. If these are your values, if this is what you want to do, you need to do that, and it doesn't matter what other people think. It doesn't matter. You need to do what is right for you. Period. At the end of the day, that's it.

Speaker 2:

Exactly A hundred percent. And and here's the thing too about like, say, established industry leaders in the online space and I mean it depends what industry you're looking in but say personal development that a lot of us are in sort of like business and personal development. There's maybe like a type you know that's of like a handful of those like leaders and influential business leaders in this personal development industry and maybe something they all have in common is that they're online all the time and they're big on social media and all of that. Remember they have teams who help them do that exactly, and they didn't start that way. Um, and I also think, for every new invention or every new like idea that has come into the world, someone had to start it and someone had to be like oh maybe a horse and carriage isn't the fastest way to get around.

Speaker 2:

Maybe I could invent something new and invent the car. So the same is for a quiet person leading in a quiet way. If no one's ever tried it, then it will never come into existence unless you keep going. So even if you don't have guaranteed success yet or there aren't industry leaders who do it this quiet way, I still think it's worth pursuing even if it takes a while to break this new ground.

Speaker 1:

Exactly, that's the whole thing. You can be first, like there's no, just because it hasn't been done before doesn't mean that it can't be done. You can absolutely be first. And the thing with being first is, if it does go really well, you get to capitalize the market for that. So there's that piece of it too. Yes, but we can't be afraid of just because we haven't seen something done a certain way, not trying it or not doing it. If that is how, if you feel like you want to do something a certain way or this feels really good for you, like you want to do something a certain way or this feels really good for you, Do it, don't hold back from that Exactly.

Speaker 2:

Even thinking like in a professional setting, say, quietly leading, or kind of like leading a team in a quiet way Sure, maybe it's not been done in your workplace, for example.

Speaker 2:

What if like that made you feel really good. That's how you shine, you know like that's how you show up best, that's how your team actually knows you and respects you. Do you think there's a greater chance that this might work than if you, you know, adopted a kind of a phony persona and tried to like force people like which one do you think is more authentic and will actually work? You know, and actually exactly false, so that there's so much like reason to try and to do it. Lean in and I feel like when you're out of alignment in terms of like doing things you don't like doing, or you're, you feel nervous before you have to get into your work or something you will burn out and you can't sustain that over time you won't be excited about it and everyone else who you're trying to guide, like clients or a team or whatever, you're going to feel that from you and you'll be miserable. So then that makes no sense.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, exactly, and this is what I say to clients all the time. If you are trying to do things in a certain way and it's whether you are working with clients, it's even whether you know I give. I give the example all the time because people always want to do master classes, it's always this one, but there are a lot of people that hate doing them, but they pressure themselves into thinking that they have to because it's what we see so often online. You fucking hate doing them. Stop doing them. Exactly, you don't need to do them. There's nothing. There's no rule saying the only way that you're going to get clients is if you do masterclasses, like that's dumb, you don't need to do it. And if you are trying to push these things so hard, you're not going to get them to convert the way that you're wanting to anyways. That's not how it's going to come.

Speaker 2:

Not at all. I love that about masterclasses because from my own experience in the in the first few years, I think I probably did my very first masterclass maybe one year in, and, if I look back, I only did that because I saw other people doing it and I, oh, this must be what you do, this must be it. And I can't tell you the amount of hours I spent making a presentation, trying to make graphics, thinking about how to promote it to people, being so stressed out about it and like no one showed up and I think and and I wasn't really ready for that and it and I was like it doesn't matter if anybody shows up, that's not being attached to results and all that kind of stuff. But I didn't even know why I was doing it. I was only doing it because I was copying someone, so it was a valuable lesson I needed to learn.

Speaker 2:

So I don't do masterclasses right now because it just doesn't feel like a fit. I don't even really like the word masterclass because it's like it's kind of like that brand, you know, masterclass like with Gord Ramsey and all the famous masterclass. I'm like who co-opted that term? In the online influencer space and said we're all masters and let's offer classes. You know, I find that very funny.

Speaker 1:

I I know I don't like the word I actually love doing them. I love doing masterclasses. It's really funny. I love teaching, I love doing them. I I like I actually really enjoy them. It doesn't take me a long time to get ready for them, cause I basically just like write up the stuff that I want to do, and it's not a lot of stress for me because I really enjoy it. So for me it is something that I really like, so I do them. But tons of people hate it, and so I'm like well, let's find something else that you actually enjoy. But I don't like the word masterclass. I wish that I could find a better way to describe it.

Speaker 2:

I know, as a communications person I'm like yeah, what does that even mean?

Speaker 2:

I think that's awesome, that you like what you said is the key. You love doing them, so they're worth doing. They're a good fit for you. If it's like you hate doing I don't know live events or something in person events, say, for example then don't do that because you're just going to stress yourself out. If you think, oh, but that's what the industry does or that's what people want, I better do that. Even this is the hard part. Even if you think it's what clients want and you really hate it and you really don't love it, then I feel like that's not going to last over time, right?

Speaker 1:

No, and the other part of that too. Are those, then, the clients for you? If you're thinking that's what clients want, you have to really ask yourself, though are those the clients for you? Are those the clients that you want to work with? Is that actually your ideal you? Are those the clients that you want to work with? Is that actually your ideal client? If that's something that they want, I would say probably not. You're looking at the wrong people, because your ideal clients are going to resonate with the way that you present something to them. Absolutely. It's not you forcing yourself into something and hoping that they're going to come.

Speaker 2:

Yes, it comes from this sense of desperation for clients, desperation to make money, and I say that because I felt it. You know, like I've, you know I've gone through these phases of I need this to work, or I've or I'll never be able to get ahead, or I invested all this money and I'm not making any back. So I got to push this until someone buys it. You know that desperate energy is no good. It actually repels people, Exactly, Exactly.

Speaker 1:

Exactly, Exactly.

Speaker 2:

So I would love to hear explain now where your business is at, because I know it's transitioned a lot over the last couple of years, so where are you at now with it? Oh, I thank you for the chance to talk about this, I think, and for anyone listening along who's like one to two years in, perhaps, feeling lost, feeling like I'm not getting any attraction, I don't know what I'm doing. I'm out here sort of posting and hoping and flailing. You're not alone. We've been there too, and a big shift that I've made recently is realizing that I am not necessarily one-on-one coach material and I'm okay with that, and I I sort of mistakenly fell into that as a business model because I was very heavily influenced on what I saw others doing online.

Speaker 2:

So when I first came into the online space, so to see and identify myself and my business as a coaching business like I teach people things and I'm going to try and get one-on-one clients or even group clients or offer a program and I'm going to help them get their transformation and all the things, that is a perfectly legit business model and it is great for some people and I almost like forced myself into that role for a long time until I realized I don't actually enjoy that much, as I enjoy writing content, as I enjoy recording podcasts, as I enjoy thought leadership and talking about topics almost like my background is in academics and kind of coming at it almost with like, like the literature and like what's going on in this industry and how is leadership changing.

Speaker 2:

So coming at it from a whole other perspective and one that is personal and relatable as well, like personal writing about things I've experienced and whatnot. So the direction I'm heading is to build a company that helps women, especially quiet and introverted ones, but not necessarily only them. It could be open for all women, but that does professional development and personal development a little differently. So, especially professional development in terms of let's talk about things like leading as a woman. Let's get beyond the you know, the stuffy hotel, ballroom, training, corporate session and have something that's like professional development for women that feels more personal, that feels more safe and vulnerable, to talk about what you're really struggling with, and that might be mindset. It might not be what's what you're really struggling with and that might be mindset. It might not be strategies and you know, and things like that.

Speaker 2:

So I'm building my business in that way, with a vision that would offer, like workshops and programs and maybe a mentorship or scholarships for women to to have education that they're missing and some of those things. That's a very different thing than being an online coach on Instagram, and it took me a few years to kind of come to this place and so I'm at the beginning of this vision and trying to build this. But the key sort of mental shift and hopefully this is helpful for people key sort of mental shift and hopefully this is helpful for people is well, I still am the one, the founder, the CEO of my company. I might still be the face of my business.

Speaker 2:

I am not my business as a hundred percent in the same way that some, some people might tell you that you are on Instagram and why I say that? Especially for the quieter ones, especially for the introverts, who tend to be private, who tend not to love putting their whole life online, who tend not to want to spend tons of time being out there talking, talking, talking and feel drained easily by all of that. It can feel like there's a limit you hit when you try and go the influencer route or the one-on-one I am my business route. There's a limit. It's like I just don't have the energy to do this. I just don't love being on Instagram stories enough. I don't want to be on TikTok, so therefore, I'm not cut out for this. So, for myself, seeing that shift, I still identify as a business woman, as an entrepreneur, as someone who is smart and professional and wants to create something that has an impact. I'm going to do it in a different way than online business might tell you how it's done, yeah.

Speaker 1:

And I love that perspective because we don't see that, we don't ever see that there is the option to not be that fully present person online, essentially, like that's what is pushed is. You know, know, you have to show it all online. And if someone isn't comfortable with that, it's like, well, you don't have another option. Like it's that, or you kind of don't do this, yeah, but that's not. It's not black and white, like it's never black and white. There's always so many things you can do between that and so many other ways that your business can look and ways that you can run it and things that you can do and decide to do and, you know, show up online and show up in different places and different ways, and it doesn't have to look like the standard. So I absolutely love the way that you're doing it.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, it made me think about the parallel and it was almost like duh, how did I not see this two years ago of when I was first that new director, that new manager of a team, and I was like, ooh, well, this is the way you got to do it, until I stopped, realized I could do it differently, gave myself permission to to do it. It took a long time to really like hone that, like over a decade and 15 years of showing up every day and running a team and learning and all of that. So it was like a parallel of wait a second, I'm doing it again. I'm like falling into. This is the way business is done online. Therefore you must do it this way. Oh, I really hate this way. This isn't right, you know, until you give yourself the permission to try a different way. And I just wanted to.

Speaker 2:

What I wrote down was for the quieter and the introverted ones, or the ones who feel afraid of technology or who maybe, like, get tired by social media, or they have a very busy life and they're like maybe their kids are little or something and they feel like but I want this business, I want the freedom, I want the success when you kind of get into that space. It's like a big sign saying you don't belong here, like you can't keep up. You're not as flashy as these people, you're not as glamorous, you're not out, you know, on the beach dancing around in your bikini or whatever you know kind of the main eye catching content is and it's saying you don't have a place here.

Speaker 2:

It's exactly the same as like a masculine dominated boardroom saying women, you don't have a seat at this table. And I want to go first. I want to break some of that down and it might take me 10 years, but you know I'm on this mission.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, and I think that that's that. It's just so. It's so amazing and I like I love hearing that because I think that it's so important and it's so important for people to do that and to be the first, like just do it, like it doesn't have to look this one way and, you know, just show up in the way that you want and lead the way, and that I try to say a just like I don't repost things if I screw up or whatever. I don't live a lavish lifestyle. It's none of that, because that is there are, like obviously there's people in the world that live that way, but a lot of us that are, you know, in here building our businesses are not living like that and we need to see more of us just living real life.

Speaker 2:

Totally. That's one thing I love about your brand and your whole the no BS, you know like it is and dispelling some of the overnight success myths or like like it is and dispelling some of the overnight success myths, or like, oh, it's so easy, just one, two, three, you know.

Speaker 2:

Like that kind of thing. It sets people up for disappointment, for for expectations that are not realistic, and I actually I'm with you. I love talking about the relatable, normal, almost boring stuff that no one points out, like, for example, I heard a podcast about it's like big name, big guest speaker, keynote speaker on stages, you know reputable person, and she did a podcast about what it took to prepare for one of those keynote speeches.

Speaker 1:

And I just loved it because I thought it was going to go somewhere else.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, no, and it was great because she, she, she said like this took days to prepare and almost like until that episode, like that's not what you hear on podcasts or that's not what you hear in content, Like I had rough drafts and crumpled up paper and I was frustrated and I couldn't think about what to write and I practiced this out loud on a walk and someone actually tells you like the real things, they do not just like well I prepared.

Speaker 2:

You know it's like well, tell me more, I want to know, like specifics, right, and it's like all that behind the scenes, real stuff, even as like boring, as I had to email back and forth with the event organizer 25 times to sort out the logistics and the details.

Speaker 2:

All of that stuff is so time consuming and important. That's what real work is. That's what real business takes and no one puts that sort of like the time it takes to do that into your expectations. You think work at this coffee shop, put out some content and then the clients are flying in right, Exactly that's not real.

Speaker 1:

No, no, and it's so true, because we don't hear about everything that goes into it and all the time that it takes, everything that goes into it and all the time that it takes what we see, like for the speaker example, what we see is the flashy pictures of them on stage nailing their speech, exactly, exactly. Well, they didn't just like hop up there one day, and that just happened with full hair and makeup and a designer outfit like no yeah no, if for me I might do that, but I don't.

Speaker 1:

Don't tend to prepare like that's. Maybe one of my toxic traits is I don't that's your style.

Speaker 2:

That's great if you can think on your feet and stuff.

Speaker 1:

It's yeah, awesome. Yeah, Sometimes when I'm on walks, I like picture myself I was ever going to speak on stage and I'm like that's what I would say. And I'm like, oh Lord, I should probably, if I ever actually get asked to speak somewhere, prepare beforehand but, who knows, we'll see I will update, if that happens, and how I prepared, which will probably be not much.

Speaker 2:

I love it. At least you're owning it, right, yeah, you're owning it. And I think, yeah, yeah, that's funny, that could have gone a different way.

Speaker 1:

I thought, yeah, I thought it was going to, because I've heard that too where it's just like this was so easy. And I did just hop up there and the words flowed to me and blah, blah, blah, and it's like bullshit. And that's not how I'm saying that I do it. It's just that my style is so laid back that I don't over-prepare, I do just. I kind of just say like what's on my mind at the time. It's literally my style. It just is so if I was going to speak at something that was like very formal, I would prepare for it. I'm not saying that I would do that, but yeah, I just I don't know.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, you're modeling modeling, though, like the exact thing I was talking about with realizing I like podcasting it's. You are not trying to over formalize yourself. You're not sitting there thinking, oh, I need to write a professional sounding you know speech before I record a video, because that wouldn't be you right. And if you thought that's what it took, like it does not sound crazy, that like for you to think that you had to do it that way. And yet so many of us, like early entrepreneurs, are doing that same thing, just in reverse.

Speaker 2:

We're thinking we got to be laid back, we got to be, you know, cool and you know this stuff and you got to just sort of like walk around your house and show your outfit of the day or whatever, and anyone who does that. I'm not thinking that's bad. I think if you love doing that, I'm. I'm happy for you. That's amazing, yeah. For someone who feels like that isn't me. Oh, there's no other option, and I think that's the mistake.

Speaker 1:

No one wants to see my outfits of the day. All it consists of is leggings and bunny hugs, and if you are not from Saskatchewan you don't know what a bunny hug is and sweatpants.

Speaker 2:

Exactly, it was like you want to see that it's sweatpants.

Speaker 1:

That's really not exciting we can start doing that if you like really want to see it, but I don't think it's going to be no, I don't think so. It's funny. Anyways, this was great. I love this conversation. I think that it touched on like so many really good things and I love the way that you are just like going forward in your business and you know, really being the first to do this and just going forward in that way. Thank, you.

Speaker 2:

It feels like scary and I have no guarantee it's going to work, and yet I feel strong enough, sort of like, in this mission or this vision. I have to keep going. And yeah, it's so, so thank you. I needed the reminder that going first is good, you know, cause sometimes you can make you feel like you don't know what you're doing. Yeah, and.

Speaker 1:

I think like that's so important. When you feel like you are so passionate about it, it's so much easier. A hundred percent, yeah. So where can people find you for all of the things?

Speaker 2:

I am hanging out every week on my podcast so the lead quietly podcast and it's on Apple or Spotify or wherever you listen. And I also have a free Facebook group and it's called the quiet leader community. You can just find it on Facebook and it's a small group. And what I love about that Facebook group it's for entrepreneurs, it's for career women, it's for stay-at-home moms, whoever it's those of you who identify more as, like, quiet and introverted, that's who's in there, and I'm really striving to make it feel safe, make it feel welcoming and inclusive and not loud and not in your face. So I actually don't care if you ever introduce yourself in the group. That's okay If you're not commenting and you're just lurking, because that's kind of where your energy at great. You're in the right place, and I wanted to create something that felt a little different and and not so in your face as maybe some of the bigger groups. So, yeah, we'd love to have people find me there. So those would be the two best places.

Speaker 1:

Awesome. I absolutely love that. So definitely go check Jen out at those places, and thank you so much for listening. Thank you so much for joining me today. If you are on YouTube, make sure that you like and subscribe and I will catch you in the next one. Thank you so much for listening, friend. I appreciate you being here and sharing in our experiences as we go behind the scenes in online business. I would love for you to hit that five stars, share with a friend that might enjoy it too, and leave a review telling me your favorite part of the show or this episode. Until next time, go, be successful, do the hard things and stay away from the BS.